This weekend edition of Doc’s Phreakin’ Weekend Tips is all about The Simple Rules of Dating.
Some of you may remember us saying how much we hate the word “DATING” because its well outdated. “Dating,” “Meet-ups,” “Hanging Out” or “Get Togethers” no matter what moniker you slap on the process you are going to need to stick to a few rules to be successful.
The First Outing (Don't call it Dating)
Remember it is totally ok to suggest something light for the fist outing (date, if you missed the first paragraph for some reason). Suggest you go out for coffee, Ice cream or drinks instead of dinner. Women hate the long ass drawn-out five course prix fixe too as it requires getting all dolled up and being pretentious.
Pro Tip: Do the whole get-together somewhere between Monday ~ Thursday; Weekends aren’t for first dates.
Always be Prompt and Prepared
Always call her early evening the day before to confirm your plans. If you are planning a surprise type thing make sure to at least drop her a few hints as to what to wear. Suggest bringing a Jacket or not wearing heels if need be. She does not want to be in her evening gown and your planning on taking her to see Li’l Wheezy and Rick Ross.
Be Creative, Show Some Initiative
Seriously fellas this cannot be driven home enough and way too many people are super lazy about this. Do not plan a meeting spot that is too close to your work or home. I’ve seen my neighbor have a female meet at our condo and walk his Jersey Shore knockoff chains little brother tee shirt wearing spray tan clad self across the street to take a girl to the mediocre restaurant that a few hundred feet away from our building. All I could think off was that lazy dick Trust me the ladies will notice this and think you are sleazy, lazy or unimaginative. You are not the “Situation”
Don’t ask her lames questions like “What’s your favorite color, music, movie… blah blah blah” the last 10–20 guys who hit on her asked her the same thing.
The Diet Plan and the Bill
She wants you to order desert and share. She may say no because she has to. She may not want you to think she is a fatass so she’ll have to insist on not eating desert. Order one and share it. Sharing equates to sexy and thoughtful.
You are paying the “Bill”, no matter what she says, so just do it. Note! You need to be a big tipper but you also need to look comfortable doing it. Drop a big tip and do it fast.
Pro Tip: If the bill is under $99 take the first number of the bill and double that… boom a 20% tip no app or tip calculator needed. That not working for your beer blasted brain try this one instead. Divide the bill by 10 and double that… boom same thing. Stop thinking about it will become natural.
Be a Gentleman, The Unwritten Rules
If you remember Chick Flicks you will remember movies like Say Anything where he guides the girl around a few shards of broken glass. Burn that image in you brain. Small lift protective gesture will go a long way to make you look like a gentleman. Help her up and down curbs, open doors, pull out her chair, ask her if she’s too cold or too warm, loan her you jacket and when in doubt hold her hand. She will be keeping score the whole night so don’t slip-up. When you drop her off or take her to her car stick around until she is safely in the car/house.
Don’t forget to tell her how beautiful she looks and be genuine about it. She is going to expect you remember her eye color and other characteristics after the first date so pay attention.
Now the tough stuff a.k.a PDA let her be the driver on this one or you risk making her look cheap. I would normally say keep it super “G” rated but todays women are a bit more forgiving so this requires you to think a bit. If anything goes down that may be slightly “R” rated you have got to call he the next day no matter what.
Pro Tip: If she touches your arm or hold on to you like she is comfortable this is a sign she is interested. If she touches your leg, she is interested tonight so don’t say anything stupid to fuck it up.
Women are like point guards in the fact they operate off of “Momentum.” When you don’t show progression or momentum they will get so bored and tired of you they will lose interest quickly. If things look like they are working for you she is going to need to see you at least once or twice a week. By the forth or fifth outing you are going to have to rock out a Friday or Saturday night get-together or she will wonder if you are juggling.